First Appointment is made

I have an appointment for December 19th but I know there won't be an ultrasound (I asked). I was hoping for a heartbeat for Christmas. I think if we had one, I'd be forced to tell on Christmas. We haven't told anyone yet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's only been a few days. Well, I usually tell people about their gift the day I buy it. I cannot help it. I get so excited.

I am trying to remain calm and trying to remain cautiously optimistic. So far, I have surprised myself my opening my heart again. That worries me a bit but I am so glad to be hopeful. Please universe, make this baby stay. I have no idea when we'll share the news.